Thursday 27 October 2011

Pointless Question: "Do You Workout?"

So in case you missed it, this is the sequel to yesterday's post. I'm sure I will encounter many more pointless questions in my life, but this one is BY FAR the one I hate the most.

Ahem.

I have a confession to make.
I am extremely confused by people sometimes.
I just don't get it.
I feel like they probably don't think through what they say before they say things actually.
You know what I'm saying?


Let's discuss something here.....I don't consider myself to be a meat-head. I mean I keep myself physically in shape for sports and general fitness, eat as healthily as possible, and I enjoy weightlifting. This means (logically) that I look larger and physically stronger then a person my height/weight would be if they didn't exercise, and yes aesthetic benefits accompany this.
That is the way the human body works.....and that is the end result of exercise, especially if you are in your prime years of physical maturity. 

This I understand.

What I don't understand is when you run into people who are blown away by this biological fact and ask one of the most pointless questions known to mankind:: "Do You Workout?"

...........................
No actually I don't.
I just sit around and do absolutely nothing. 
In fact I stare at weights and can absorb them into my body as muscle.
It's a well known fact that sedentary activity and 'making wishes' allows for one to physically get in shape.
You mad??
But seriously, what retards....

Do I look like I workout?
Because if I do look like I workout then why do they ask the stupid question?
Are they expecting me to answer with something like "No, it's magic I'm secretly Harry Potter" and then cast a body-morphing spell on them??
Are they expecting me to tell them that I just shoot up with 92 kinds of drugs and spontaneously get huge??

Honestly people, how am I even supposed to answer this stupid question? 
If I say yes, I look like the biggest narcissist ever, and if I say no I am a liar. 

Lose lose situation, thanks douche balloons.

So to answer the question then yes, I workout. As I mentioned earlier it's called a biological process. It is not magic. It is not from doing nothing. It is for many beneficial reasons.

Holy cow this actually annoys me so much.

The stupid question isn't even a compliment, it's just ignorant at best.
A compliment would be something like "Hey, you look really good, keep it up." Or "Looks like your workouts are paying off." Or even "Looking huge dude, mang yo."

Or maybe people could even have the intelligence to ask something regarding what kind of workout program I have found to be most effective. Or what exercises I like best. Or what steps I have taken in order to accomplish goals I have set out. 
That would be acceptable and understandable!
I have no issues with helping others out with training or legitimate exercise questions.

However, asking "Do you workout" is like asking a Safeway employee who is in uniform "Do you work here?" 
Grahhh.

So next time you see someone who looks like they're in good shape or they workout, assume that they do!
If you compliment them and they say that they don't actually work out that much, then you are in fact paying them even more of a compliment because they have good genes. They will feel warm and fuzzy and you will have made their day. If they do workout, then you don't look like the dope who is creeping on them and asking them the ever ridiculous"Do you workout?"

Do not insult people by being a farfanoogan (The little turd left over after you poop) and stating the obvious.

It makes you seem as smart as roadkill.

It makes us who exercise want to make you roadkill.

Ugh.

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