Sunday, 27 November 2011

At the Gym: Ipod Idiots

Here's the thing.

You go to the gym to workout, exercise, or whatever it is you do. ( I really really really hope this is why you go. If not, find a trainer.)
You take your Ipod with you to listen to music/pump you up/motivate you/focus/enjoy whatever.

The problem is when you become an Ipod idiot and you have your earbuds shoved so far into your eardrums and turned up so loud that you couldn't hear air raid sirens if they went off 2 feet away from you.

Don't think I don't know what you experience......because trust me if I turn my hearing aids off I can achieve exactly the same effect. And if you honestly think your music isn't that loud...think again doofus.

Know what happens?? 
  • You constantly bump into people because you don't hear them behind you
  • You don't hear if someone asks to use the machine you are using or when you will be done with it
  • You don't hear someone yelling at you to "WATCH OUT" when a weighted bar is swinging at your face
  • You act completely aloof and distant when at the water fountain which makes people convinced you are a Latchkey Child
  • People mistake you for being syndromish
  • You head-bob back and forth, up and down to your gangsta beatzzz, but can't respond when someone tells you your butt-crack is showing to the world
  • A car-key gnome will jump on the back of your treadmill and  pickpocket your locker keys from you without you hearing them. They then steal your car-keys and hide them in an obscure place so you can't find them. Or they steal your Honda. Darn car-key gnomes.
This is  extremely annoying and hmmmmmmm I dunno.............DANGEROUS???
I mean it's one thing if you're at your house listening to your music so loud you drown out the world--fine.

But to be where people are swinging around heavy objects and dropping weights and gathered in clustered group is just idiotic. 
Let's be realistic here, if you want to listen to music by all means go for it!

But make sure you can at least hear the people around you so you can be normal, not seem like a moron, and generally stop accidents from happening.

When I see these Ipod head-bangers I want to just punch them in the face and then take a dumbbell and smash it mercilessly into their Ipod.

1,000,000 times.
Until it is a pile of ground up twisted metal and plastic and wires on the ground.

Good riddance.


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